What’s Next, Nafsi?

You reek of sin,
a bloody stench capable of
making one nauseous;
sometimes, even me,
but its effect doesn’t last long
as I’m always quick to forget,
having learned to skillfully
mask it by the impalpable perfume
of your unfair justifications,
in the vain hope that it will
not just cover up but eliminate
the deep guilt I feel inside;
but, it only intoxicates you further.
I can see evil obvious in my eyes
that shine brightly
in your growing darkness.
The superficial look of innocence
on my face is in sinister contrast
to your undisguised ugly thoughts.
I am aware of the grotesque reality
of your transgressions
that weigh heavily on my chest,
forming dark spots on my heart.
Every sin like a cut on my wrist,
Slicing through my skin,
deep enough to peirce you.
It shakes us from within,
messes up our system,
But we smile through the pain,
Like we ain’t feelin nothin.
Shame is the medicine
we traded in for sin, our drug.
I wonder what’s next..
What’s next, nafsi?

* * *

Nafs is the Arabic word for soul, nafsi translates to “my soul”.


18 thoughts on “What’s Next, Nafsi?”

    1. Haha you must be kidding! πŸ˜„
      I feel flattered by your suggestion though, πŸ˜‰ Jazak Allahu khairan for your kind words and encouragement as always. 😘❀❀

      Liked by 1 person

  1. Salaam! Wow amazing words – but then again you’ve always had a knack for writing really well haven’t you?
    Although I don’t really blog anymore I was going through old comments and I came across a comment from you that I never even saw – I felt so bad! I don’t know why I never got the notification for it – considering you and tam had a whole conversation right there in the comments! There were all these other comments I didn’t get a notification for either and I felt so bad that I could never reply because I didn’t even know they were there!
    I hope you’re doing great, and everything is fine πŸ™‚ I just couldn’t believe I had missed your comments of all people I had to come here although this was ages ago and you probably don’t even remember haha!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Revels! Wa’alaikumus salaam wa rahmatullaahi wa barakaatuhu! It’s so good to hear from you after such a looong time siiisss!! Where have you been?? I’m sorry it took me so long to reply tho, the past couple of days have been quite hectic. But Alhumdulillah I’m doing good by Allah’s Grace, hope things are going well for you too. Ohh and no need to apologize, it’s totally ok! And I do remember that particular poem of yours, it was beautifully expressed and more importantly a much needed reminder masha’Allah! Why haven’t you been blogging much lately though?
      Love & duas 😊❀

      Liked by 1 person

      1. I’m good I’m good alhamdulillah – I’m glad you’re not too annoyed at the comment thing haha!
        Erm I kinda don’t blog anymore – I don’t know why. I just felt like it didn’t represent me the way I am now if you get me? So I thought I just couldn’t. So I stopped. I occasionally come over to check out everybody else tho – but it’s becoming lesser than before. Just going through a phase, got lots of questions and not enough answers ha.
        Kher, how have you been? I’ve been speaking of myself haha. You seem to still be writing away ma Sha Allah!!

        Liked by 1 person

        1. Nah not really, the last time I wrote something for the blog was like three months ago 😳
          If it’s not too personal what kind of questions? You can talk about it if you want.
          I mean I’m kinda confused right now, because the revels I got to know here was someone who loved to write, was opinionated and had a passion for sharing her views with the world. I could never have guessed that you’d stop writing. I really do hope that its just a break you need and that you will get back to writing really soon InshaAllah πŸ™‚

          But again if there’s anything you want to talk about I’m here insha’Allah ❀

          Liked by 1 person

          1. Aww don’t worry I haven’t stopped writing – it’s in my blood haha can’t let go of it. And I suppose I could ask you, but I’m just scared people would think bad of me and plus this is kind of too public a platform. Thanks tho I love how you’re willing to help! Do you by any chance have any other social media?

            Liked by 1 person

            1. Haha I’m sure it is!
              I don’t use social media much, but we can definitely keep in touch through email? I know email’s pretty old school but what can I say I’m an old soul myself πŸ˜„ I’m talking going on long drives and preferring talking on the phone over texting and I’m not even kidding πŸ˜…

              Liked by 1 person

    1. Wa’alaikumus salaam wa rahmatullaah Yusra! I found yours while browsing through another blog I follow. I was so glad to find poetry on it I just knew I had to subscribe! I enjoy reading poetry a lot (actually it’s the only thing I’ve got the patience to read tbh 😊)
      Hopefully I will find time to check it out soon insha’Allah. Jazak Allahu khairan for your lovely comment! ❀

      Liked by 1 person

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